Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Happy CNY!

Happy CNY people!

Hmm, for some reason, this year CNY kinda lose its excitement... maybe it's the economy. But I kinda feel that it's because of my age. Almakz! I am old le! Sigh!

But on the other hand, I always feel that anticipation is always better than the thing itself. Meaning, the anticipation leading up to CNY is always more fun and better and exciting than the actual new year itself. Also, I kinda feel that the anticipation to my cousin's arrival is better as well. Or, the anticipation to a great sporting event (such as World Cup and Olympics) is always better too. It kinda gives one a direction, something to look forward to, and something to work towards to. After the thing is over, there is always withdrawal symptoms, the lack of direction, yada yada. It's just an opinion, but sometimes I just wish that time can go slower so that I can anticipate longer...

Anyway, lazy to talk le. Got some pictures to post... my cousin's pictures, plus a couple of CNY... so let the pictures do the talking...

This is the picture whereby he was saying "下下下" and wanted to sit between my legs and played with his cars... I LOVE THIS PICTURE!!! =D =D =D =D =D =D =D




This one is a bit blurry... but I wanna post his smile... Isn't he like super duper cute??!! My family love him to bits! CNY pictures with lion dance next...


After the lion dance.... they provide toto numbers! Haha! Please my mum so much!

My cousin and I... she's older than me. Rarely see her one. I remember last time when I was young, she used to play with me a lot...

Cheerios. Till next time...

ferngrass Loves her Break@10:19 PM | 0 comments

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Tired and Happy...

Sorry to my friends who I have been not replying my smses on time or totally ignoring your calls or smses or emails or for basically, disappearing from the earth entirely. I was really really really busy day and night...

These few days passes extremely quickly. My aunt and cousin left for Bintan Indonesia this afternoon for CNY with my maiden family. From Mon till then, my life has been about Lucas, Lucas, Lucas and more Lucas. Every morning, I will hear the word "下下下" which means he wants to get down from the bed. And it's about 8am in the morning when he did that, which is like -_-'''' because I have not been up so early unless I got woken up by the alarm clock. When I went out with my aunt, I am basically looking after him, playing with him so that he is not fussy and delay his call for "Mama, mama.." so that my aunt can shop in peace for a while. He is most familiar with me after my aunt due to the fact that I spent the most time with him. Hence, when he saw strangers and my aunt was busy, he will come to me, make me sit on the floor so that he can sit between my legs (he will go "下下下" again, meaning that he wants to sit down. But to him, up and down are "下下下"... lol ) and play with his cars there. And also, he will hug me without prompting =) And also, whenever he got things he wants to show me, he will pull on my hands and pull me to the place and point to show me =D

See, I am familiar with his baby language! Whenever he goes "tedi tedi" I will have to find his pacifier for him. When he said "titi titi" it means he saw taxis. And when he saw animals, he will go "狗狗" for ALL ANIMALS. LOL... And he threw things like his pacifier, milk bottle, things that we gave him to play whenever he's happy. And he's even happier when he hit people's heads with things. LOL, although he's naughty, my family looovvveeess him. He always tries to charm the passers-by, esp the make up counter girls. Whenever we are going to leave, he will wave bye bye, kiss goodbye and if we said "Lucas, show your beautiful eyes" he will bat his eyes! And he has beautiful lllloooonnnngggg eyelashes! Imagine how happy are those girls!

But my family literally cannot sleep the first night. My mum said he recognised that this is not his house, so he cried the whole night wanting to go home. And he wasn't happy when he has to bathe late in the night because he wants to sleep. Poor baby, and poor us.... And I had to carry him on the first day for close to an hour! He's really heavy and so my arms cannot even pull straight after putting him down and I have arm muscle ache for 2 days! No joke ok! No wonder people say carrying a child can build muscles. After these few days, I really think so loh. Cannot imagine what will happen when all of us get married and have kids... but I carried him on and off after the first day (and carried prams to taxis, shopping bags) and also ran after him whenever we put him down to walk in shopping malls and pick up all those things he thew. But he brought a lot of joy in my family and sort of break the routine we were in before =)

And taking care of a baby is not easy. I always thought infants are harder to take care, but now I think toddlers are hard too! All the running around to prevent him from taking things can tire one out! My cousin tried to take the barcode scanner when my aunt put him to sit at the cashier counter while she was paying... hahahaha...

My aunt and cousin will be back 2 weeks later after CNY, and we shall make plans there =)

Btw, his skin is damn smooth lah. Makes me so jealous. And his 2 dimples are damn damn damn cute =D And btw, Da jie, Lucas loves my pedicure leh. He kept pressing his index fingers into my toenail and touched the surface of it....

I got a couple of pictures. But I did not take a lot of them this time because I have my hands full from taking care of him! But I am lazy to put up now. Shall put them up next time....

Anyway, things may be looking up a little these few days. I hope it will last.... think maybe it's Buddha's blessings plus Lucas giving me luck (he did hug me and hold my hand many times this time....) So many people asked him to pick 4D numbers... haha! This few days gave me more than what I am wishing for....

I am glad that I am those people who loves kids, can play with kids and have a little affinity with them. Kids are so fun to play with, so much joy, and I am glad that I don't miss out those fun. And maybe, whenever you play with kids, you get back that little innocence that you missed (or left behind) when you grow up. And so, with this theory, does it mean that those people who can't play with kids are complicated?? I don't know, it's just a theory.

I really have a cute cousin =)

Ok, I am tired. Really want to go to bed soon. Haven't been to bed so early for many months loh.

Cheerios.

ferngrass Loves her Break@10:29 PM | 0 comments

Monday, January 19, 2009

Tomorrow is the day!

Yeah! My aunt and cousin are coming in the afternoon on mon tml! Actually technically is today because it's already past midnight... Going to have some photos galore later!

Anyway, I was reading Zoe's blog and her latest entry about online shopping, and somehow I remembered something which bothers me. This thought of mine is totally unrelated to her entry actually, so I am not sure how come it came to me. Anyway, some time ago, I remembered I was really hurt by a friend's remarks. I told this friend of mine (let's just call the person B) a secret/ issue out of confidence, and a couple of months later, when we have some disagreements, B threw this secret back at me, meaning to hurt me in the process.

I am generally okay with jokes, even those that make use of my "flaws". Eg, "Everyone listens to you because u are noisy, not because you are popular" that kind of thing.... You can tease me about it and I am fine. But when a comment is used to hurt me, I am NOT OKAY. Generally I am happy to say that I always try to give the person the benefit of doubt on whether the person is trying to hurt me or not, but in some situations, you always know.

So imagine how shocked I am when B threw that comment and secret to me. In any sense, if one unintentionally hurt you without knowing, the person is at fault, but not entirely. But in "other sense", when a person delibrately does so to hurt u, the person is really to blame.

So what lessons did I learn from this?

I learnt to shut up a long time ago. I learnt that to open my eyes wide to see how the person is and make sure that I totally trust the person before letting him/ her know my secrets. I realised that I used to trust a person way too early and learnt my lesson the hard way. Usually, for now, there are only a couple of people who knows my deepest issues. But still, I kept my deepest, darkest secrets way inside my heart...

And probably, the only people I can trust in the whole world without fear are my parents.

And yes, I have trust issues still. But better safe than sorry. I never want to experience that kind of feeling again....

**Fun fact: My stars alignment for lunar new year 2009 warned me not to trust too many people this year.... so my trust issues are not exactly way off...

Just some random stuff now. I went for a facial on sat and my beautician commented that I have "小姐" hands!!!! Rah... this is the second time I got this comments in 2 months! Told me that I have very nice hands that shows that I don't do much housework... Doesn't sound very positive leh. She also said that I have nice eyelashes (everytime I get that comment. And she meant that I got a nice proportion length. Eg, the middle is a lot longer than the sides of my eye...) and very fair skin. I am starting to feel that I am really fairer than others. I got that comment way too many times to ignore it. To think I used to think that I am just as dark as others... And she liked my hair! So far those people who saw me with my new hairstyle like it... I am going to see how my aunt thinks about it when she arrived =)

Anyway, these few days I am inspired by some words whenever I surfed the net. "Have faith in the process" and "Rejections are just part of a journey" are some examples to name a few... but I am incredibly happy that I got the support that I needed.

The video below is from Danny K, who said "Have faith in the process"...




And my house Buddha very poor thing... I asked her questions way too many times these past few weeks...

And I am still considering my mum's crazy idea.... should I go and try it out?

Cheerios.

ferngrass Loves her Break@3:43 AM | 0 comments

Friday, January 16, 2009

Golden Globes

I absolutely *heart* Leo and Kate... they can be my favourite on screen couples ever now.

And Kate won 2 golden globes! I am so happy for her because it's really her time and I hope she wins an Oscar!

And so do Leo! Because he has lost so many times that I really want him to win! From Gangs of New York, to The Aviator, to Catch Me If You Can, to The Departed, Blood Diamond and now Revoluationary Road, it's amazing that he hasn't won an Oscar yet (though he won lead actor in The Aviator). And as a fan who followed his movies every year, it's really painful to see him losing everytime =(

And Heath! He earned his golden globe... and I hope this also means he wins the Oscar too.

And I am looking forward to watching Revolutionary Road! It's going to be amazing, I knew it.

I am so glad that I am no longer those "flicks" girl and are now looking forward to watch these artsy movies that pushes people's imaginations, provoke people's thoughts and make one think about his/ her life after finishing the movie.

And yup yup I love awards shows. And yup yup I am very good with Hollywood news and actors. If I am applying for a position in Mediacorp or SPH magazines I am sure to include that in my application. But too bad, no...

A couple of videos to show...

I found this video about Kate on Oprah and Oprah was commenting on how she likes Kate's breasts... Hahaha...it's so funny!




And this part of Kate saying she loves Leo is amazing too... (but the titanic music in the background is really annoying...)


And the last one is about Heath finally winning a golden globe... "an awful mixture of sadness and pride"...



Cheerios

ferngrass Loves her Break@7:00 PM | 0 comments

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Fate

I was just watching friends (again) as well as keep listening to the Life is a Song song and wondered, isn't it strange how fate works in wonder ways?

I remembered how I made my friends and it's a wonder how I made them.

I met Zoe when we got into a argument when we both wanted to put our school bags in the same spot. We were pri 2.

I met Hui Fen (or wei yun... whatever) when we sat next to each other in class. We were pri 2.

I met Jul when I was assigned to sit right next to her in the classroom. We were pri 4.

I met Xiao sam, Joce, Wee Inn (among others) when I was transferred into the best class. We were Pri 4.

I met Eleen when she initiated an introduction to me because I looked extremely like her friend. We were sec 1.

I met Stupid Nat, Cher, Kim, Siang Yu (among many others) when I joined guides. We were sec 1.

I met Mei Xing when I was looking for someone in 2B. We were sec 2.

I met Adeline when me and Qianhui made friends with her and Felda when we were outcasts of our class. We were sec 2.

I met Yiwen when I was sitting in her seat before class talking to Jul. We were sec 2.

I met Ting Feng (for real lah, not through some kind of rumours) when we were in the same class. We were sec 3.

I met Jiang (or XY which I can't say the full nickname out or else he's going to kill me..) when I went to his tuition group. We were sec 3.

I met Irene when we were in the same orientation group in TJ. We were JC1.

I met Jacelyn (Zoe, this is for ur benefit!) when I was assigned to be the same project work group with her. We were JC1.

I met Ying Qi when I sat beside her during orientation. We were 'freshies".... goodness, I hate that term. Make me sound like a vegetable.

I met Linda when I was forced to sit beside her during Stats lecture (cos I was late, with yingqi). We were Year 1.

I met Huiteng darling when she sat in the same director's room with me to do our internship. We were Year 2.

I met the rest of the IE gang when we were in our internship. (still remember trying to look for seats for 10 over people for lunch...)

I met Da Jie when we were in the same project group for global marketing. I was Year 3, she was Year 4. (Haha! This is the odd one out)

I can't include all, but it's really fate isn't it? So strange in some of the ways we met, esp Zoe (haha girl, urs is classic sia. No one can beat yours).

Well, in short guys, I think fate works in ways that we don't understand. But since we have met, we might as well continue our friendship ok!

LOL, this post is totally random.

Anyway, Danny K has a new single and video out called Outta Control. Frankly speaking, this is not one of my fave songs of the album This is My Time (and I have a lot of fave songs on that album), but this video is totally cool. And he's really damn good looking and sexy... haha!




And I am back to watching new HK drama now.... 與敵同行 with Roger Kwok and Kevin Cheng! And I realised that Kevin Cheng is actually REALLY SHUAI... not wasted to see him as well when he came to sg with Raymond Lam. But Lam Feng is more shuai.... haha!

Cheerios!

ferngrass Loves her Break@3:28 AM | 0 comments

Saturday, January 10, 2009

The O.C.

LOL Youtube is finally up in order... and I can post my videos!

Here's the ending of the The O.C.... jul, I think u can understand if u want to watch this without even watching the season 2 or 3. Just need season 1...



Honestly, I love the ending song. And how Summer has her hair down on her wedding day.... if I can do it on my wedding day (without feeling EXTREMELY HOT), I will put my hair down on my wedding day! It's like so pretty... And I always love the Marissa shot in the dusk sunlight, so it's so cool to include that in the ending...
And in actual fact, I think Taylor and Ryan makes a cute couple too....
And this ending makes me cry...
And the song is so nice too...


Life is a Song - Patrick Park

You say life is a dream where we can't say what we mean
Maybe just some roadside scene that we're driving past
There's no telling where we'll be in a day or in a week
And there's no promises of peace or of happiness


Well is this why you cling to every little thing
And polverize and derrange all your senses
Maybe life is a song but you're scared to song along
Until the very ending


Oh, it's time to let go of everything we used to know
Ideas that strengthen who we've been
It's time to cut ties that won't ever free our minds
From the chains and shackles that they're in


Oh, tell me what good is saying that you're free
In a dark and storming sea
You're chained to your history, you're surely sinking fast
You say that you know that the good Lord's in control
He's gonna bless and keep your tired and oh so restless soul
But at the end of the day when every price has been paid
You're gonna rise and sit beside him on some old seat of gold
And won't you tell me why you live like you're afraid to die
You'll die like you're afraid to go


Oh, it's time to let go of everything we used to know
Ideas that strengthen who we've been
It's time to cut ties that won't ever free our minds
From chains and shackles that they're in
From the chains and shackles that they're in


Well life is a dream 'cause we're all walking in our sleep
You could see us stand in lines like we're dead upon our feet
And we build our house of cards and then we wait for it to fall
Always forget how strange it is just to be alive at all


Ok, I am running out of topics to blog le, so shall end here.

ferngrass Loves her Break@5:26 PM | 0 comments

Friday, January 09, 2009

Lessons in Life (Edited)

I guess in some sense, I learnt a lot for this one week.

I realised that decisions are always hard to make, and u need family and friends sometimes to help you.

I realised how important family is. I mean, I always know that, but I only know how much and to what extent this week.

And somehow I pity those people who complained about their family. Those people who complained about their parents all the time, who never talk nicely to them, who thinks that they are annoying. I know I did that in teenage years (who doesn't?), but now I make an effort to be nice to them no matter what.

Parents don't live forever. I learnt this the hard way, when I have a scare that I could have almost lost my mother when I was 14, when I know that my dad's age is close to retirement, and when today I realised that I am shaking when I typed this. Cherishing them is important, and love them is just as much.

I am glad (and count my lucky stars) that I have a great family life, when my mum is my friend, when my dad is my protector. I am glad that my family is full of love, whereby I want to support the family not just because I have to, but because I want to. I am glad that I want to give my parents a good life because I want them to with all my heart, and not because I have to.

Career, relationships, and all the other materialistic things can never compare to family life. I am a lucky girl. And I made myself a pact that family will always come first. U can always rebuild a career in a couple of years, but it takes a lot of time to rebuild a family.

People, if u have been unkind to ur parents, I guess now is the time to change. I guess u don't want to regret it for the rest of ur life... And if in some sense, I said something here that may offends u, please understand that I did not mean to. It's pure coincidence.

And I heard a saying that anyone who is fillal to their parents can never be a bad partner. And how ur kids treat u will be how u treat ur parents. So I guess, this means that being fillal is important....

I personally feel that family keeps one humble. It is family that keeps one grounded and humble, that always allows u to be who u really are. And I guess humilty is important too. I now understand that there is no need to think that others are jealous of u or u are better than others (or some other things that doesn't sound so humble) because they can be having something that u do not have. I said a year ago that God is fair and I believed so. He made us all equal so that one can never be 'better' than the others. If u are pretty, that means u are probably not a genius. If u are pretty and a genius, that means u are probably not popular. I noticed this in Hollywood since most of the stars have turbulent lives (or used to) or less than perfect lives. So what I am trying to say is, family will make one not spiteful, because one cannot be spiteful if they can never be jealous of anyone.

And I also realised how important friends are. They are with u no matter what decisions u made, no matter how much u chewed their ears off, no matter how much trouble. I am glad that friends have supported me and gave me confidence when I needed them. And so if these few days I have been chewing ur eyes and ears off, thanks! I deeply appreciate it.

Anyway, have been thinking about my career for many days these days and my mum came up with a totally crazy career path, which after serious thought, doesn't sound so crazy after a while. But if I seriously want to do this, I will have to really start from scratch, and definitely a hard (and many door slamming) path ahead. Hmm, maybe I should take the plunge, but the stakes are super duper high....
In a random note, sometimes I do look back to 2008 and just realised that I 'shed' a lot of blood in 2008, literally and figuratively. I shed a lot of blood in my school work (and help a few others along the way) and am totally proud of my work. Esp for marketing research mod whereby I know the main difference for my grades comes from my efforts (all my efforts) and know that I still got it in me. Also, from the literal view, I got a bite on my calf (which hasn't fully recovered, still got a mark) and extracted 2 wisdom teeth (which is one of the most painful things I have done).
And just as well, I wished I haven't turned so vain in 2008. Yup yup I am admitting that I am vain! The reason for that wish because I think that is one of the reasons my results went into a downward spiral before picking itself up again..... when it's a little too late... (but I got a little consolation of the thing I wanted before I left uni though it's still a little too late....)
Ah..... rattling now...

********************************************

For some light hearted things now. Meet up with my Da Jie again this week, and she treated me to a nail spa and pedicure! She is always giving me stuff so I guess next time I got a lot to repay her! And her bf actually, who has given me some advice. So now I got nice pedi now that I dunno whether I bear to take off in 2 wks time. And no ugly heels! At least most of my dead skin cells are gone... thanks da jie! For all the materialistic (and vain but pretty) things and also the deep thought conversations and the laughter we have.... I am glad that one MRT trip from school back home will allow me to make a friend that feels so much like a big sister that I never have =)




Above is the ice cream that we ate at swensens... No pictures of us this time, because one of us never put make up, one of us reckons that she is too ugly for pictures that day =)

Just finished watching The O.C. season 4. It's a great season (so much better than season 2 and 3), and it's such a pity that it ended its run. I remembered I was so looking forward to the show in 2003 season 1 that I never fail to catch it every week. And I absolutely loooovvvvveee the ending. It's like one of the best endings of shows that I have ever seen. Shall try to find the ending and post it up here, because currently I think youtube got problem. And if u ever watched O.C. for season 1 u will know how touching the ending is =)

So now, resume watching Gossip Girl! Season 2 return after a mid season hiatus! And I finished ep14! New fave drama!

"Welcome Upper East Siders, Gossip Girl here. Your one and only source to the scandalous lives of the Manhattan's Elite..." ........... "You know you love me. XOXO Gossip Girl"

Yeah yeah, I watched so much that I know the lines of the beginning of the show and the ending so well....

Ok, so I guess that's it. Till the next time.

Cheerios...
**Need to learn to let go...

ferngrass Loves her Break@4:56 PM | 0 comments

Saturday, January 03, 2009

F.R.I.E.N.D.S

Another one of the best Friends' jokes that I forgot... I laughed so hard when I was watching the re-runs...



Ross: You ducked!!

Joey: I'm sorry! It was a reflex!

Ross: Oh my god, this really hurts!!!

Joey: I couldn't help it! When a fist comes at your face, you duck! Look! (He goes to punch Ross, expecting him to duck, but he doesn't and Joey punches Ross in the eye! Gunther looks very happy.)

Ross: What is the matter with you?!?

Joey: You were supposed to duck!!! Why didn't you duck?

Ross: Why don't we talk about this on the way to the hospital?

Joey: Good, good yeah, (grabs the bags) maybe while we're there, they can check your reflexes. (Joey opens the door and it hits Ross in the face with it.) "Oops"

Oh.... love it love it love it. Takes my mind away from matters...

Hope I can make a good decisions soon. All lords help me please...

*P.S. And I think I am letting go... which is a good thing since I have more than enough things to worry about...

ferngrass Loves her Break@3:57 PM | 0 comments